Perpetually Whacked Out

Moved again.

2008-03-31T12:48:00.002-04:00

This site has kiiinda been abandoned, so in the event you get the feeling I have posted something, go to oleetku.wordpress.com for the shiny kinda new Zero Overballance

*waves goodbye to blog* Good bye blog...I will miss you... But at least I'm not deleting you. I'll keep you around, even if you become covered with dust...

F*R*A*G:
Does a whole bunch of people screaming "DUN" in unison in a loud monotone voice really count as a dramatic soundtrack?

2 things I like

2007-04-12T20:05:00.000-04:00

Anime and Mitch Hedburg! It's a new revolution!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mLfhI4U7ITg&mode=related&search=

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nCicMdJS12M
F*R*A*G:
I have a hint about something that sucks. I bet it's google's acquisition of blogger!

Fun, Fun Winter.

2007-03-12T20:48:00.000-04:00

First, something neat:

I like these guys. I don't know who they are or why they do what they do, but you gotta like the door scene. And now that that's over with...

I have taken a break from Okami and Castlevania DS for a dismyal purpose. I am sad to announce (although this is probably common sense to the more observant readers out there) that arcades are becoming a thing of the past. Internet and all that jazz I suppose. To me, this is a tragedy for twofold reasons.

Firstly, It's always kinda been a life's dream of mine to own my own arcade. It seems like a good compromise between work and videogames. Unless there's some sort of resurgence in arcades, then this dream is kinda out the window. That would suck, because then I would have to work for real. Oh well, guess I'll just have to come up with some reason for people to go to the arcades...

Secondly though, There's an aspect to arcades which is for the most part lost in the world of online multiplayer gaming. Although they may be real, you don't get to see your opponent. Sure, there he is, killing like 8 guys at once who just spawned after you killed them all, but still. Luckily, you still get the sence of rivals and cliques and such with the formations of clans, but it's still not the same. I watch some of the tournaments on Gamespot, and you can get into following players and matches and it gives nerds out there the same sence that others get from watching football or hockey. But for the players themselves in this case, all their enemies are just names. The action may be intense, but where's the human element? This is actually what I was aiming to reintroduce to gaming with the SIG, and I think it worked fairly well. Except it's the same people over and over, and a lot of us play together anyway. It became a meeting more for the people then for the games.

This is why I want arcades back. You meet your opponent. You play the game. You find out where you stand. And when you're done, you're left with a tangible person who you can choose to persue outside the game, mutually agree to be aquainted through the game only, or just ignore complely. Either way, you can look back and point and say "There's that person I played against." Friendship or rivalry, there's an actual person involved.

Maybe it's ironic I'm a gamer but I think that people should be an importaint part of the experience. Sometimes. And people are less likely to be all out assholes without the anonymity of the internet there as a buffer. Or, sometimes you need a break from people. That's all fine a good too. Just as long as you don't try to permanently escape from society. Then you're a nerd AND a loser.

Okay, my whole rant on this spewes from a trip I took to the arcade in the mall the other day. I still enjoied one of my most passionate passtimes, but I also got to make fun of people and their pop culture, get yet another reaffrimation that I am way way on the bottom rungs of DDR-dom, and I was challenged by a random big black guy at Soul Calibur II. I won 2 of 3 rounds, and it was damn intense. Partly beacuse it was a really fuckin close' match, but also because my introduction to this man was Ryan saying, "Hey Nick, this guy wants to have a go against you." We both went in dead silent, and went at it. At the end of the final round, he won and we both bounced away from the machine praising/cursing the mystical powers that be. (Also, I was a bit afraid that this guy would eat me. He was shorter then me, but totally outweighed me. I'm damn happy he was friendly to me.) But do you see what I mean now? I have no idea who the hell he was, and I'll probably never see him again, but I doubt I'm going to forget that encounter any time soon.

Now, back to those single-player games I'm obsessed with for the moment. Then some very involving 4 player action with Anders and people later this week...

F*R*A*G:
Behold the wooly panda. He is plump and round. The nearby sound of a throtling chainsaw frightens him. "Eek! Eek!" says the panda.

New theory time!

2007-01-15T22:21:00.000-05:00

My current mood in now way warrents that exclamation point of happiness.

Here's the theory:

There's a question that's been going around all philosophist circles, and more poiniently, the nugaty filling that is my mind. How does the universe work? For a while now, I've been working under the theory that all of the universe is a ballance. It seemed reasonable. Orbits, plants needing co2 and making oxygen/humans needing oxygen and making co2, men and women, physics, etc. It worked, and probably still is working.

The prolem is, I think I've only been experienceing (or at least observing) only good things. Not bad, but my understanding of the universe deserves counters to all this. There is, of course, the chance that it's all being ballanced somewhere else, but this demand is still creating a mental instability in me. If it is, then it's reasonable to assume that it is the root of my masochitic tendancies. I mean, doesn't is kinda make sence that whenever I get hurt or punnished or something, I smile and begin laughing a good hearty laugh because suddenly my inexplicably unending good luck has just been ballanced a little, and I don't have to worry that it's going to hit me later on?

Well, that's my theory for now.

F*R*A*G:
Why is everyone making refrences to the ass?

Zen acheived. Resetting...

2007-01-03T20:26:00.000-05:00

In this game, you are robot (#). Your job is to find kitten. This task is complicated by the existence of various things which are not kitten. Robot must touch items to determine if they are kitten or not. The game ends with robotfindskitten.

F*R*A*G:
Let's hear it for the Vauge Blur!

2007-01-02T15:14:00.000-05:00

Ten Top Trivia Tips about LCom!

Ancient Greeks believed earthquakes were caused by LCom fighting underground.
LCom can last longer without water than a camel can.
A LComometer is used to measure LCom.
Humans share about fifty percent of their DNA with LCom.
Koalas sleep for 22 hours a day, two hours more than LCom!
Forty percent of the world's almonds and twenty percent of the world's peanuts are used in the manufacture of LCom!
Native Americans never actually ate LCom; killing such a timid prey was thought to indicate laziness.
Carnivorous animals will not eat another animal that has been hit by LCom.
Red LCom at night, shepherd's delight. Red LCom at morning, shepherd's warning.
The number one cause of blindness in the United States is LCom.

So...I found a cool generator site. I like it.

F*R*A*G:
LNG: lol natural gas

Vast minority.

2006-12-21T21:59:00.000-05:00

Soo...

A while ago, I'm not sure how long, I was standing outside the stores at Merchant Square. I distinctly remember looking up into the sky and feeling something. I felt as though I was waiting for my life to come by and pick me up. Not a person...I was with people, and I was just waiting for them to finish up. It felt like life was still busy, and I was still there waiting for it to come by and get me so we could ride off into whatever exists beyond the vast horizion.

I left, and so did that feeling. I had only thought of it one other time before today, but tonight I thought back to it, and I got a new feeling which was similar, but different enough to be significant.

There I sat, in front of Bonito's pizzaria. Mountain Dew in one hand, and zipping up my coat with the other. -(One interesting thing to note here is that the jacket in question is one I haven't serriously worn in a while (freshman year?), but is in fact the inspiration for the jackets worn by my characters KornrosE(the emo one) and CLN (the one who entered a voluntary exile into the shaddows).)- I put the can down, and I get a feeling. At first, I think it's the same feeling as last time, because that's the strongest feeling I remember for that place. However, I soon realize that it's not the same. In fact, it's esentially the opposite. I know it's not waiting; I'm all by myself. Entirely. There's not another soul in sight. (That and the amount of sleep I was missing was probably key to my being in a philsophical mode anyhow.) It comes to me that the feeling is actually the realization that I have options. I'm in control. I look at my car, the obvious option, and begin to realize that even once I start driving, there's an innumerous amount of places to go, and things to do when you get there. I look at my car, and see it as a tool of infinity, and watch all the possibilities eminate forth from it. It's quite a neat effect, even if it is entirely in my mind.

Then I finish the soda, get up, throw out the can, and go home. 'Cause it was really freaking cold out.

You see what I did thar? I made a point. Nifty ^_^

F*R*A*G:
Goth girls are the girls that go to see the nerdcore rapper with the geeked-out flow at the show. You can see the black lace on parade; I've met a hundred dozen of them but I ain't got laid...

The first thing I read.

2006-11-19T21:27:00.000-05:00

Okay, I've been bouncing between wanting to do a video blog, and just screwing that over and writing an entry, and that's my excuse for lack of this. But today is just...well, was uniquely off enough that I have to write about it.

Ever get one of those feelings that the forces of the universe are against you? That was the kinda day it was. I mean, just in genreal for me waking up at 8 in the morning without an alarm clock going off is a bad omen. And that's without even mentioning *edit*.

Since about hte middle of the week, we had actually had plans for today. It made sence: Kill a lot of birds with one stone. Get people to hang out (with anders who has been even more reclusive lately cause of...well, signs say school, but who knows. I mean, he hasn't been around to tell us why he hasn't been around (*edit*). Plus, I'd pick up Madden '06 on the way to meeting my Burnout 3-- uh, my friends, and we'd play for a while, then watch a buncha Gundam offa netflicks. Plus, the Burnout 3 and Madden '06 would be on my memory card and help me get a true 100% on Burnout: Revenge.

That's a lot, right? Wouldn't be to bad if some things went wrong, right? Well, ALL OF IT WENT WRONG.

First, I couldn't get out of the house. All the extra morning time led me crazy, and so I reorginized the shelves above my T.V., and then that just ate a lot of time so I forgot that I needed to do laundry too. Got it done, even if I was late leaving.

Then, you know, the battery in my car was dead. Ain't that a kick in the nuts.

Well, not that bad actually, because the whole day just led me to not wanting to go anywhere. But, well, pops was around and he knows how to fix things, so I eventually got on my way to Anders'.

Town was packed, so I skiped the rental part and just went to Anders'. Have I mentioned I hate town?

Finally at Anders' (an hour late..at least), turns out only Nicky showed up, and that Shaun kid never did cause...well, statistics say it's because he sucks. Tim actually would have been a replacement better then the origionally planned person, but no one actually realized how available he was until about 10 minutes before everyone left, so...that was fail too.

Me an Nicky went back out (Anders stayed behind to make sure his house didn't burn down) and found a spot luckily, and then went in the clocktower. And of course, they didn't have Madden '06. Neither did Joe's video. It's possible that it doesn't exist! I have to go look around some more to make sure I'm right about things... But still, this means I can't start my B:R quest again yet, and apparently Arjay has my Burnout 3, so I need to get that back too... But I digress. Nicky and I came back with Ikaruga instead, and we learned something. That game is freaking hard. I like it, but it's freaking hard. We gave up on that pretty fast, and switched over to the promised Gundam.

Well, tried to. The disc was broken when it came out of the envelope. Sucks soooo much ass. So, we switched over to Madden '05 (GRRR...so close...) and, actually, it went well for everyone but Anders, which is new.

1st half: Nick - 18 anders - 0
2nd half: Nicky - 32 Anders - 7.

It's funny. I'm not good at that game, but Nicky was the one who let a goal get through. Well, the game ended and Nicky and I left. Figured it was best to cut our losses, and I still had an essay to write (I got it done before I started this post...I guess I'm responsible or something...).

Okay...well maybe it was more loss-cutting for them then for me. Since like...friday, Krystle was asking if I could help her scan something, and I said maybe today if there was time when I got home. "Thanks" to the lack of success of the rest of the day, there was some time. So she came over, I scaned her thing, she helped me prove I fixed my wacom tablet (that's not a euphamisim. She doodled something in photoshop while it was open for the scan, and doing so unknowingly proved that I know what I"m doing when it comes to computer troubleshooting.), and then I walked her home.

There was a nice sunset.

Really, anyhting that sucked about the morning didn't matter once we saw that together. And really, everyting since then has been easier to deal with. Granted, nothing bad has actually happened. Mom came home and I helped with dinner. Worse thing was writing the essay, but I actually figured out what to write while I was walking back home. Soo...no trouble actually. Plus, I actually got the proof that the snowflakes outside my window in their glowyness looks totally sweet awesome in my room when it's dark. I'll prove it to you. Damnit.

Still, that sunset with Krystle is stuck in my mind. It's good to have stuck in there.

Oh yeah...Comic is almost done. One more page to draw, then the Photoshoppoing, then just print some out. I gotta do the comic math...

I go bed now.

F*R*A*G:
Since when is your father a "washing machine repairman"?

Questionable Proteins

2006-10-13T14:52:00.000-04:00

A Nickel for a Noob

Imagine if you will...

It's the finals of the Counter-Strike tournament. Clan DKO versus.

The round begins, and all of the members move out...except for Spaz. Why? Let's say one of his brothers/sistes just ate through his mouse wire and he's scrambling to find a replacement.

In his absence, the battle continues, and all the members of DKO are picked off in the dwindling battle...except for Spaz, who is still at the spawn. Finally, no one is left except him, and he's finally ready to move out. He runs out, wondering where the hell everyone else has gone too.

Suddenly, a burst of AK fire brings him to concousness. He dives behind a pile of corpses for cover. As bullets whizz overhead, he finds that the corpses belong to his fallen comrades: LCom and Angelus. Just as they were preparing to "storm'a bitch", an enemy flashbang goes off between them, and they open fire. Neither one lives. While a classic example of teamkilling tragedy, Spaz is able to reap the spoils, making off with 3 of LCom's grenades and Angelus' auto-shottie.
As is his way, Spaz starts tossing the grenades every which way, somehow managing to use each one to kill an enemy, including the one who was camping the bomb which was under Airpi's corpse, blowing the bomb right into his ken.

"PLANT TSAR BOMBA!!!" The rest start screaming at him. A moment of bainless pondering later, and Spaz makes a run for the bomb. He trips over it, and slides into a room right behind the back of another enemy. Twitcher that he is, the auto-shottie completly unloads, killing the enemy and giving away the rest of his position. Now that it's empty, Spaz dropps the shottie and makes for the bomb again, this time grabbing it and heading off.

"OKAY! NOW STOP HERE AND PLANT!" Another command, this time quicker understood. Spaz crouches and begins to plant.

5

4

3

2

The sound of a single shotgun blast ends the count, and a headless Spaz slumps over the bomb.

Missed one.

The eternal own is once again acheived, and DKO misses the win by a single shot. They don't win the $10,000. However, because of his amazing and "totally bullshit lucky ass bastard" comeback ability, the tournament masters still award Spaz with a nickel. He was owned, but he deserved it.

And that's "a Nickel for a noob".

I'll explain the rest later.

F*R*A*G:
Captain! Everything is going to balls down here!

Ping!

2006-10-10T22:03:00.000-04:00

I thought this was neat.

CRUTCH!

It reminds me of someone, but I won't say who because I think they'll kick my ass. But at least since this guy is cool that's a good thing!

Rock on, cripple man, rock on...

F*R*A*G:
I wanna bowl with the gangstas.

The right side is failing

2006-09-25T02:00:00.000-04:00

Ahhh...now this is more like it. Crumpled into a ball on the floor of a dark room with a laptop at 1:57 in the morning. This is how blogging is supposed to be for me.

And a thought struck me...Well, 2 thoughts...well, a very many thoughts, but only one was something to write about and only one other was related to anything at all.

Anywho...I love Krystle Mauro. This'll bring anyone who's not aware up to date. I knew this no better then on saturday, which we spent together because she was leaving the next day for a week (which gave us a good excuse), and since neither onw of us is really smart enough to sleep at night, we ended up falling asleep for a little while. Parents do not fear...we weren't doing anything bad (*edit*). I'm not sure how long we were out, but when I came to, I found her in my arms, and at that point there was no doubt in my mind about my love for her.

And I was like "You're awesome" and she was like "well, you're perfect" and I was like "*pfft*, yeah I know!" :P

You see, one of the only things that really gets to me is waking up alone to an empty house. Falling asleep is no problem because I either have music or TV or games or blog, and then I just pass out. Comming home to an empty house is no problem either, because it lets me blast my music and get down to business (I am much more self motovated when isolated). But waking up...ugh. I wake up slow enough that I forget my dreams before I gain the ability to focus on the day, and that leaves time to be...depressed and slow. It sucks. Plus then I don't get to eat in the morning, cause I don't cook 'till 11.

That's like, one and a half thoughts.

Oh, and if you notice that edit, that was my second thought. Normally, I'm walking around during my day and I see something like... a 6-on-6 street hockey game happeneing in the parking lot of the jify stop during the short time after the stores close but before the lights go out, and I think "dude, that's wild. I should blog about that. Then I get home, sit on my ass for a while, then when I finally get to a blog point, I'm thinking more along the lines of *edit*, which is something I really don't want to write about because I've learned that saying certain things will get me into trouble. At the same time, limiting wha tI can say really throws off the ole' writing rythm, so I don't get anywhere. So, I figure it's time for compromise: I write whatever the fuck I want, and then just comment out the parts that I think'll get me into troucble. This way, I'll still get to record everything I want to say, my ranting style will go unhindered and flourish once again, and I don't get yelled at for being a dumbass! Everyone wins!

I'm just gonna say...Keep on the lookout for a video blog, and as for the next comic FUCK YOU I DON'T WANT TO GET A JOB OR HAVE TO THINK ABOUT COLLEGE. It's bullshit.

...I've gotta go get a job and pick a college now...

*edit* School's going to be hell for me tomarrow...I'll see the nurse second period for a nap.

F*R*A*G:
At least...that's what the interwebs told me...

The Legendary Drifter GML in the Ninja car!

2006-09-24T23:51:00.000-04:00

I need to write, but I don't feel like it. Also, I can't. I kinda want to put my head through a wall. That's a bad situation to be in.

I'm gonna jot some notes, maybe do a video blog. There's a lot on my mind...

F*R*A*G:
I love you and I wish you the best of luck, your music sucks and you're an asshole...I'm having a hard time expressing myself right now...

Why is that mecha...moaning???

2006-09-07T22:00:00.000-04:00

The other day I had a really scarry experience. I was making the right turn from Whickam Village onto Kings Highway. After a few seconds of driving on that road, my dad smacked me in the knee and said, "Do you want to get on the right side of the road now?" I didn't get what he meant at first, but suddenly I got it and swerved. I had been driving in the left lane.

That really scared the crap out of me. It's not that I fear oncomming traffic, but more that I really did not notice anything wrong. I was quiet for the rest of the ride, as I tried to figure out what the hell I was thinking. By the time I got home, I figured out what it was.

I just felt like it.

I guess I really do just live in my own little world. I always have. I don't know if ever endangered my life before. I bet it has, but there just wasn't someone there to smack me out of it. I'm thinking I should drive with a person around all the time. Just in case.

Well, I think living in your own little world is actually nessissairy if you're gona be an artist. Unfortunately for me, I've had to deal with a lot of artists in my time, and...they all piss me off. I find they all fall into one of three categories: Crazy nice, crazy and withdrawn, or totally full of themselves. Anyway, I think you need to be in your own little world so you can put your own twist on everything you see.

Er, yeah. I'm sure I had more to say, but damned if I can't remember most of it.

I do know, that Star For: Command for the DS (IT IS STILL A GAMEBOY) gets the LCom Seal of Approval. It's the first game I have ever played where every button, including the d-pad, is FIRE. THAT. IS. AWESOME.

Speaking of games, I think the next two games I'm going to review (finally) are going to be Little Fighter 2 and Frentic Plus. I beat Frentic Plus today, and it was awesome. I think I'll go beat it again.

School sucks T_T

F*R*A*G:
The name of my new book will be, "Semicolon: What the fuck is it for?"

Reincarnation and the Water Cycle.

2006-08-30T23:57:00.000-04:00

Do I dare?

Do I dare revert to an old style of blogging, and say any and ALL of what has been on my mind?

Do I dare do this, and open myself to the great and entirely way too possible bad repercussions of this action?

...

Naw. Not tonight. I'm to tired and'll screw it up even worse. I might do it soon tho.

Instead, I think I would much rather take you on a journey I have found myself taking lately. And this starts with something which I think is neat, and yet can be rather disturbing.

The song "Ring around the Rosie" is about the Black Death.

Did a memory from your childhood suddenly become a chill in your spine? Welcome to my world. (Well, not really. I learned this fact when I was a child, so it all kinda feels like a warm and fuzzy memory...the song and knowledge, not the plauge.) I've found lately that as I am growing older many things I knew about my past are turning out to be much less innocent then I originally considered them to be.

"Semi-Charmed Life" by Third Eye Blind was always one of my favorite songs. I always remembered it for the "Do-doot-doot! Doot do-doot do-doot!". It wasn't till much later on that I even noticed the lyric "You’re the priestess, I must confess / Those little red panties they pass the test / Slide up around the belly, face down on the mattress".

Outlaw Star, Gundam Wing, and Sailor Moon were all these animes from my past (just cartoons back then, before "anime" had any meaning to me...) which had this very mystical and ultimate feeling to them. now I find that GW and SM both kinda...suck...a lot more then I remember at least, and OS is still good, but I find that the main character is so much more a pervert then he ever was in my memory! (Thank Cartoon network censors for that...)

And worse then that, I'm rather astonished to become aware of how many memories I find myself taking a part in destroying! Wether it be forming sore spots around activities enjoyed with a long past love, or taking a lost favorite food from youth, and putting it to use in a new form, much MUCH unthought of by the little kid in the candy shop.

Well, I guess this is growing up.

...

Damn you, Blink 182!!!

F*R*A*G:
This is a fair warning: Stop what you're doing or I will molest you.

In your ass.

Just get right on up in there.

DO YOU REALLY WANT THAT?

He's got a gun! Finally! A Final Fantasy game I can make it to the end of!

2006-08-15T23:09:00.000-04:00

DAMNIT THAT WAS A LONG, BORING ASS BOOK!!!

In Cold Blood, by Truman Capote. I'm actually not gonna write to ca'pooty and give him one of those

Dear Mr. Cupppitty,

If I ever meet you, I'm going to smack you.

Love, Nick.

because it wasn't that kind of book. It was a book which...I suppose was worthy of...whatever the hell it was that it got. BUT. He has a knack for going into details at odd moments, for too long, and then manage to finish these detailed deviations without actually mentioning anything of worth, either to the story, or even in general. Maybe as far as characters are concerned, but only as far as Perry. Everyone else was "A great guy/gal from a small town who was repulsed at the murder of the Clutters / messed up in the head / killed."

Hehe..."but"...

Either way, I don't think Truman Capotlofloflofkenstan is that good of a writer. He was just crazy enough to write a book about a touchy subject, and eventually get around to some emotion jerking scenes, from real people no less. I'll admit to good book, but not good writer. And even at that, I don't think I ever could have finished it if it weren't for the fact that, with summer slowly dwindling and school approaching yet again, I am severly behind on my summer reading assginment. I mean, I'm thchnically still reading at least 5 other books, but Cold Blood is one that I wouldn't even bother putting back on my bookshelf after finding it at the bottom of some random box a year from now. That's right. The entire box exists one year from now. But I find it in 6 months from now. Take that, continunity of time!

Plus I'm thinking that the written part of the summer assginment is a crock anyhow. We have to say how we relate to the book. The book is about the brutal murder of a family of four in Kansas in 1959.

::Beat: Waiting for at least two things wrong with that situation to come to light in your brain.::

Way I figure it, it must be a test. Anyone who manages to write more then a page on this subject is imedeately escorted down to the school psycharist's office. It actually seems a lot like another simple sanity test that my Norwegian acquantince was describing to me just the other day:

"The subject is brought before a bathtub, and watched as the bathub is filled up. Once the bath is full, the subject is presented a bucket, a spoon, and a thimble, and then is asked to empty the tub."

"Ohhh...and if they're sane, they'll use the bucket because it's bigger then the other two..."

"...Nnnooooo...if they're sane, they'll pull the drain plug."

This encounter reveled absolutely nothing new about my person to anyone.

Even though I though the book to be mostly more strugle to read then it was worth, I did find one thing of interest. ::grabs book and flips through pages, looking for a certain passage:: A ha! Here it is.

On page 322, we are introduced to two young men: George Ronald York, and James Douglas Latham. At 18 and 19 respoctively, the passage goes on to reveal how they went on a killing spree of 7 people on their way across these United States. Later, after their capture in Utah after the murders, a local channel was allowed to film an interview with the two young men. When asked why they did what they did, they replied simply, "We hate the world."

Although minor characters as far as the novel is concerned (granted, the majority of the major characters are all dead by the end of it...), reading about them imedeately brought to my mind another duo of violent teens: Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold, the Columbine students who killed 12 of their classmates before killing themselves.

I get pissed off when Columbine comes up. Not (just) because of the fact that it was a huge killing spree inside a highscool, but more actually at the blame placed on media and music and video games saying that violence in media causes violence in people. I can call bullshit on this pretty qucik. An old saying runs, "art imitates life." Granted, with the invention of post-neo-modernism crap (I say crap, but I am somewhat a fan), life has begun to imitate art in some odd cases. However, for violent movies and music and game to be created, there had to be violence to base it off of. A thought is not sparked until life sews the seed. And this York/Latham deal has to be some form of proof of that. Both incidents have two teens who decide to kill people because they come to the conclusion that life sucks, the world runs on hate, and you probally do a person a favor by killing them. It's people who come up with this shit, they don't just copy what they see and hear. The only argument that I'd let you get away with is that some thing like DooM could guide them into have some sort of tatical sences, or something along a vein like that. I can agree to that. But only if you consede that this won't happen ifffff a person isn't PSYCHOTIC. You control your own life asshole, you don't get knowledge of how to build pipebombs and where to shoot first shoved down your throat. In fact, Zefrank made a good point once: Once you start learning to play the gituar, the gituar sections of songs suddenly become more apparent and have more meaning to you. I say it works the same way: You won't notice that you can use DooM to train for a shooting rampage unless you allread thought about going on one.

And to be honest with you, I think Harris and Klebold were really intersting guys. I would have really liked to get to know them better (and not just because the only two people they told to escape were their friends). I mean, shit, the Trenchcoat Mafia was the group of outcasts in their school. I see gorups like that around out school quite often. Shit, me and mine are probally like what they were to some extent (I remind you, once the boys started talking about a killing spree, the Trenchcoat Mafia did kick them out, and so when it finally happened, the TM wasn't involved with them anymore). Also, they obviously had some unique views on...just about everything, and by this point, all that you can find is bits and peices of what they left...meerly hacked transcripts of the tapes they wanted the world to see after they killed themselves... Oh man, the things I would've given to be the third guy in the basement when they were making their tapes. I would have taken no part in the massacre, but I still wonder what the rest of the world still doesn't know about these boys...I mean, I could have been the one who stayed alive to make sure the world saw this all. Been the one to set everyone straight as to why they did what they did...

At the very least, maybe that Asshole Jack Thompson wouldn't have come out of whatever dickwheat feild he oozed from...

But that's beside the point, and meerly a bonus. And alas, here I am, trying to scrap together what I can of their mindscapes. Oh well. Enough about mass murders.

I got one book done. I'll write the paper on it tomarrow, then...sleep. Start on the next one. Go do stuff with Krystle. Sounds like a plan to me.

I'll have more when I'm done with things about murder. Don't worry, it'll be by the end of the night...

F*R*A*G:
Devil went down to Warwick, he was lookin' for a soul to steal. He was in a bind because he was way behind and lookin' to make a deal. When he came this young man playin' some Quake 2 and playin' it hot. Devil jumped up on a channel called #stump and said "Boy, lemmie' tell ya' why! I bet you didn't know it, but I'm a CS player too, and if you care to take a dare I'll make a bet with you. Now, you shoot a pretty good DEagle, boy, but give the Devil his due. I bet a PC of gold against your soul cause I think I'm better then you." The boy said, "My name's Johnny, and it might be a sin, but I'll take you bet, you're gonna regret, cause I'm the best there's ever been!" He played: Dust2 on CS, UT Onslaught! Devil's not too hard let him spawn some bots. Kick him from the server, HAX! he's back in! Noobfaggotgayhax-lol, child, lol... [awesome fiddling goes here]

Ducttape and ass.

2006-08-09T00:25:00.000-04:00

Hmmm... Let's see what this does...

Attack me if you dare... by ~LCom on deviant ART

Hmph. Well...now I'm off to go camping. Mother fucking camping.

F*R*A*G:
Nutter Fukkers!

Choclate milk + butter making proccess = choclate butter

2006-08-03T01:57:00.000-04:00

And then Darkness settled over the land. And the young boy said,

"Oh good God that f*$%ing sun is gone and it's finally starting to cool the f@&k off."

If you couldn't tell, I don't like the sun. Outside I really don't have a problem with. I mean, I was one with the snow once. Only for a couple of minutes, but it happened. Then I go talk with the animals and consider the plight of the onions in the feilds and then fall asleep on a picnic table. It's pretty nice. But that friggen sun. i'm grateful to it for, you know, giving us energy and life and stuff, but it needs to learn to back off. Literally. It's too close, and it's making me hot, and that sucks. Don't forget, I'm astonishingly covered in hair. Heat really sucks when you're me.

So far, in order to escape the heat when the dark embarce of night isn't an option, I've been lying on the floor in my hallway. It is quite possibly the coldest place in my house. Try it sometime, if you don't belive me. Next best place is down in the basement. Actually, I've even been driven to voluntarily go into a pool. An odd place for me, but I must say, water is kinda nice. Not my element tho. I'm really damn close to drowning every time I go swiming. But in this heat, I'll go take my chances. The really funny part is that I was swimming all day, and I didn't tan at all, really. Like, I did a little, but that might have happened when I was trying to light the barbeque and a giant flame shot out and hit...pretty much all my exposed skin. Granted, it was the person next to me who got eyebrows burned off, but that's only because I've had experiene with barbeque flames in face.

Bah. I've had enough of this. Wake me up when it's sunday, because that's when things 'll be fun for a while.

F*R*A*G:
Have you ever been eating cake, and suddenly thought to yourself, "Son of a bitch, I could be getting drunk right now!"

This post is called Nelson.

2006-07-31T12:15:00.000-04:00

Well, I come up with a master plan that would allow me to attend E3, one of the seemingly awesomest things I've ever heard of, and now I hear it's been canceled indefinately.

Ain't that a bitch?

Well, no reason to stop what I'm doin.

F*R*A*G:
Aww man! You mean I'm gonna have to make due with only two balls?

Ahh...to be young again. And also a robot.

2006-07-30T22:06:00.000-04:00

Uh oh... I may have done something that could be useful. I registered a new blog with Blogspot, and rebuilt it into a Freeware computer game review site.

For those of you who don't know, freeware basically me computer programs that are free. This is as opposed to shareware - demos meant to be shared over the internet and such - and normal software, which is what suckers go out and buy.

Now, while it could just be a excersize in having an ego on my part, I like to belive that it's really part of my master plan for having a future. You see, I've done reviewing before, both on my own, and with GameHippo. On my own, I thought it was too much work for something which no one was reading. When I was with GH, I made some miscalculations, and said that one guy made a game that was just okay, and as it turns out that everyone else thought of him as a god, so I decided it was best to leave before I got...shot.

Now, by some twist of fate, although I haven't been back there in at least a year, I am still on the list of people who get mailed new submissions. This keeps me up to date on some of the new games I might other wise have missed, AND on how much people seem to want to play bingo and poker online. This glitch combined with my own ability to lookout for new free games because I'm broke and free is the only thing in my price range gives me a supprisingly large knowldge of free games.

And to get around the other problem I had of most methods being to complicated, I went ahead and used the blog system, which I find sutible for almost all my internet needs. Click "make new", put in a buncha words, link to some pictures or files or websites or whatever you want, and then it goes on the interwebs. The simplisity lets me focus more on what I want to do content wise, and not worry about what new pages need to be coded, and folder setup, and crap.

So...back to why I threw together a review site in two days. I figure there's at least the possibility that if I put enough reviews up, then it could pass for experience, and maybe I could become the reviewer type that gets hired by game magazies/websites, and then not only would I be paid for somehting remarkably easy and enjoyable for me, but then I'd get opertunites to go the the big gaming conventions and events. E3 comes imedeately to mind. That would be another notch on the wall for me.

So yeah. I got the site up and ready to be filled with actual content. I did the two games I posted on the happy lotus forum, and I figure I'll move on to the greats in my collection like Warning Forever, Little Fighter 2, Beats of Rage, Frozen Bubble, Vantage Master Online, and whatever else tickles my fancy.

I think this might turn out well for me.

But, most of this will have to wait about a week. My three monkey cousins are up visiting, and while they are suprisingly intwined in the abundance of internet in my house, I'll still be giving them a lot of my time as we go to the beach, bowling, hiking, and all the other outdorsy crap I only do when they come up.

It's not that bad, tho. It's really not the outdoors that I dislike. I have no problems with the outdoors. just that asshole of a sun. Once the sun goes down, I like goin out. Actually, the only thing I really am gonna miss out on this week is seein Krystle. But, ya'know, I don't get to see my cousins that often, and I know I'm gonna see her Sunday, and I'm gonna make sure we have fun. And I don't just mean fun, but I mean fun. Like, wathing a guy on a cell phone absent mindedly walk into traffic and getting hit by a bus type fun.

I'm not sure what that fun is yet, but it's comming.

F*R*A*G:
Scratching the itch in your brain you didn't know you had.

Daughter!

2006-07-29T01:35:00.000-04:00

Allright, I think I have it. Remind me to take a shower whenever I need to come up with an idea. It seems to work that way.

Online Songs
Blink 182
[camera direction included]

[Open on a blank table/desk in a room (my living room?). A young man walks in, drops a pad and pen on the table, and sits down. He picks up the pen and begins writing, and as he does, the lead singer walks into scene unoticed behind him and begins reading the words on the boy's paper over his shoulder, going between looking at the paper and the audience, as though he is reading to the audience.]

Josie
You're my source of most frustration
[constant paper look]Forget when I [shift stance to look over other shoulder]don't meet expectations
[singer dissapears, close on paper]Everything you wished came true
In the end we all blamed you
Even though as they all know [by this point, pulled out to see boy staring into space in thought]
You weren't the only [taps fingers on counts] one... two, three, four

[gituar break has cuts of gituarist playing alone in room with boy, again, unoticed]

[gituarist dissapears, boy gets up and walks over to window.]Why do you still keep it around
when you know it brings me down
I'm hating everything
[boy sees girlfriend and new boyfriend -played by the singer- standing in street outside]And I know that you've dated other guys
[closeup of kiss between gf and nbf before they walk out of scene, boy can be seen in window in BG]But I gotta wonder why
You'd leave it out for me (SHIT!) [on shit, as walking out of scene, nbf gives-single finger-gun-wink thing to audience]

[gituar break shows boy running outside, verse begins with him entering in street looking down street towards where he saw gf and nbf, who are now gone]

Why am I still hanging around
when I know it brings me down
I'm hating everything
[cut to camera following boy in from street into yard]And you are getting rides home in his car
You're making out in his front yard [pauses to turn to look at car in driveway as he's passing it]
And hating everything [runs towards house, camera doesnt' follow]

[in a basement somewhere (schumer's basement?), or some area of concrete influence (stanley demming fishwall?), the band in playing the chorus]

[zoom shot singer 3/4 left]Please don't remind me
[zoom shot singer 3/4 right]Put your past behind me
[straight on singer]It shines so bright it blinds me
I wish that this would end
[low floor shot of boy sitting in chair in same area as band plays in their spot in the background]Am I am not fine
[grabs his chest as in heart pains]Last night I saw you online
[falls on floor as in pain]Your screen name used to be mine
[falls limp as in giving up the fight to live]Why can't we just pretend

[next verse takes place at some restraunt/cafe (tuscan?)]

[grazing shot of a front window, boy comes into scene and presses face against window, staring inside intently]If we could have another day
I've got so much left to say
I'll tell you everything
[close to boy from inside cafe]And I'll laugh when I think about the past
When I see you after class
You're hating everything [at this point has pulled back throught cafe to show gf inside at a table, enjoying herself, with some person who remains unseen offscreen]

[cut to black, boy quickly backs his face out of camera in shock]Please don't remind me
[running away from cafe]Put your past behind me
[runs past band who is playing along the sidewalk, unoticed, runs off]It shines so bright it blinds me
I wish that this would end
[scene looking down the sidewalk as boy comes running toawrds camera, singer is leaning against the corner building, looking towards camera and sining]Am I am not fine
Last night I saw you online
Your screen name used to be mine
Why can't we just pretend

[busting into house throught front door]Please don't remind me
[close up of grabbing letter off table]Put your past behind me
[walking out of front door and away from house]It shines so bright it blinds me
I wish that this would end
[walking down street]Am I am not fine
[another angle, same scene]Last night I saw you online
[approaches mailbox of another house, band playing unoticed next to mailbox]Your screen name used to be mine
Why can't we just pretend
[putting letter in]And she said...
[band dissapears, wide shot of boy in front of mailbox, emphasing empty street, then fading into other scenes showing boy in emptyish places, final fading scene is him approaching stage (stanley demming?) where band is playing for a big crowd, now finally noticed]Na na na na na.... (I just forgot you were there...)

[singer straight face singing]Please don't remind me
[slow low rotate around band as singing]Put your past behind me
It shines so bright it blinds me
I wish that this would end
[boy fights through audience]Am I am not fine
[looking down from onstage, boy makes it to stage, looks at band]Last night I saw you online
[looks elsewhere]Your screen name used to be mine
[runs off back into crowd]Why can't we just pretend

[boy finds gf in crowd and pulls her out, then slow pan up to band still playing]Please don't remind me
Put your past behind me
It shines so bright it blinds me
I wish that this would end
[dynamic shots of band playing]Am I am not fine
[nother angle]Last night I saw you online
[nother angle]Your screen name used to be mine
[nother angle]Why can't we just pretend
[lower onto boy and gf, away from crowd with crowd in bg]And she said...
[gf turns from boy and walks off, boy looks down and dejected]Na na na na na

[While music fades out, fading cuts of same angle so it appears that the band, the crowd, the straglers, and finally, the boy, all fade out, eventually leaving an empty stage in background]

See, I have a feeling that Pat Slevin should play the young man because he seems quite emo as he stands. The members of player one could stand in as the band, and then the girlfriend could be played by Krystle with me as the new boyfriend. Personally, I like the key of adding insult to injury by having the singer of these tomrented emotions be the bastard that the girl went off with. I'm a bastard like that, but also I think it works with some of the beats in the song.

Now let's get cracking, people! Even if we need replacement people, this needs to get DONE.

F*R*A*G:
Just put on the blindfold and DRIVE! Vvvrrrmmm... (Crash into a wall? Start again. Vvvrrrmmmm...)

Stare at the camera.

2006-07-29T00:11:00.000-04:00

Allright.

*yawn*

After watching a lot of TV and movies and internet media, and the Simpsons, I've come up with some observations.

Okay, more exatly, I watched a lot of the old Simpsons, some of the new, called the new crap, then decided that if I back up my crap calling with "observations" then I would at least be making an attempt at contributing to society, but still get to call things crap.

Now, most of the time it's a question of what you're going for. When you have only 26 minutes to work with, you can fit Homer's Oddsey, but you just gotta do it fast. Never stay in one place too long. Also, once a person has played their part, they never need to be seen again. Using letters or computers as plot devices work, but then you miss out on any chance of making the appearance that the characters aren't isolated in their own little world.

Now, sometimes you want to stretch somehting out a little, either to give details or to render feelings of akwardness. Guess what folks. An akward pause (a.k.a. a pregnant pause) can be effective when only one and a half seconds long. Even if you wanted to stretch that to a point where the characters, audience, and nealson ratings guys are litterlaly SUFFOCATING in akward silence, then you still have a minute forty-five left to finish a scene in 2 minutes. Do it right and you won't even need all that.

Short things are fine. If you manage to fill up 15 minutes with scenes tha barely hit 2-3 minutes, then that's quite a bit. Remember, most hit songs are somewhere between 1:30 and 3:00 long. If you can do things like that and get even an hour out of that, then that's quite the impressive heap of content. It gives room to apeal to different sences of humor, genres, ideas, and the ocasional burst of randomness.

Don't forget, in this society, people are being trained to survive by keeping track of many things at once at the cost of the inability to focus for too long. Remember, quotes are memorable, but it took me 2 hours to memorize a solioquly from Machbeth (and still got it wrong when I recited it the next day, I might add.).

Why do I bring this all up? One, it's yet another entry in the series of works which I create in an effort to convince myself that I'm smarter then other people, and also it feels about the time that I film something. But I need to write it first, and this is a good way to think about things I need to keep in mind.

Actually, first I think I would like to shoot a music video. Why? Cause it's an excersice in filmography. no words, but you still have the chance to tell a story. Why not just show all the stuff they're talking about in the song? well, if you saw Ted's Pants, you'll see how, while possibly entertaining, it turns corny and repetive. Fast. So, sprinkle it in wher you can, but telling a seperate story that shares emotions and/or themes with the song is probally a better bet. Make it fit with the beat too. Sorta like Video Video Revolution...

But don't listen to me. What the hell do I know. i've got great ideas but really haven't acomplished anything. Yet. Get your ignorin' in while you can, cause soon I'll be proven awesome, and you'll have to listen to me.

F*R*A*G:
Ninja star in the eye.

perrrsonal bubblllleeeee...

2006-07-28T02:30:00.000-04:00

I feel better now. It's begining to actually feel like my old blog, and looks more like it every time I tinker. I like to tinker. Oh, and as it turns out, CSS sheets are hella easy. I hate to admit it, but I might begin to use them more, if i manage to find a worthwile way to impliment them.

Next, fix that header picture. Since I made the title the background (post modern), I'm going with a "not tellin' you the name" type of title. Counter-intuitive? You bet your sweet ass it is.

Then I gotta fix links. not only in the sence that a lot of the ones on the side here are either broken or no longer accurately represent my commonly visited sites, but also in terms of needing to re-link my stuff to this blog. I think at the moment the only thing which links to it is...well, the "random blog" link on blogger. I need to put it in places where...you know, people might actually go to read it.

Unless, perhaps, I don't WANT people to read it... I mean, after all, it's MY blog, yes? This problem I've been having with not being able to dump my entire mind due to people reading it and getting pissed off or whatever would be well dealt with if people simply stoped reading, yes? But this makes no sence to me, because if it were merly an Emily Dickensen deal where I'm archiving so people can discover my mind after I'm dead, then I would simply have a book somewhere (I do, but that's beside the point). This is the internet. A meeting ground for peoples with brains and hands. I expect this to be read, and damnit, I want it to be.

...Might help if I started putting up new content again...

Oh well.

But on that note, I'd like to take a moment to announce a new experiment!

I want to make a one shot Aloof comic.

A what?

A one shot Aloof comic. As in, not part of any arc, but still in the universe with the same characters. I have around 4 pages planned out, but based on those it looks like it could be at least 6 pages long. If I don't make copies on my own, I might go see if the school voice will print it for me. Might as well go out with a bang for senior year.

Oy, that's a whole bunch of troubling thoughts on it's own. For another time tho.

So, since I seem stuck to draw the next main comic, I figure I'll go for this. It'll be practice on full book style comic-ing, and maybe I can use it to get recognised more. Somehow. Wish me luck.

F*R*A*G:
"Gah! You ripped out it's heart!" "Well, it needs to learn..."

Colony drop.

2006-07-27T23:40:00.000-04:00

I seem to have developed a taste for cold pizza. This will come in handy when I move up north to Alaska to go live with the penguins.

Note that I didn't say I'm going up north to get away from people. It's somewhat implied, but it really isn't because of that. I just don't like heat.

I would like to get a summer home up north actually. If not Antartica, then maybe just way up in Canada somewhere. I know normally what people normally do is go south for the winter, but I'm going north for the summer. To some artic jungle where I get to...like...build a fence or something. No real reason, but just because that's what you do in summer homes I think. I dunno, I don't have a summer home. I've never been rich.

F*R*A*G:
Fighting the urge to use a blue colored pencil to stir the powered cheese into the microwaved macoroni...of life.

WARNING: you just bought hot pockets.

2006-06-24T01:38:00.000-04:00

Yes, I'm aware that pretty much no one reads this thing anymore, but I really don't care. Hell, it's only origional purpose was to be a stoping ground for my literary attempts. The point was never to express information or have popularity in any of it's forms, nope. It was just for me to write if I felt like writing. And to that extent, it's been successful all this time.

And if you are, or ever have been a fan of the blog of Nick Korn, then odds are you have thought "hey, he's not that bad of a writer." (Note: I'm not (just) having dreams of granduer here. Other people have told me I'm okay at this, aand I base that statement on them. Blame them.) But really, I just write the way I speak and think. I talk to myself a lot anyhow.

See, I used to have imaginary friends. A whole lot. (we're talking 4-6 year range here, I'm not that pathetic.) But it got to the point that I knew I was taking to one of them, but I just didn't really know which one. I just imagined a whole bunch of them in a line, and I'd just start talking and assume that at least one of them was listening. Then I just lost the imaginary friend part, and now I just talk to myself. I'm fine with that. For some reason which I have not worked out (yet), when you speak, you comprehend what you're thinking in a differnet way then when you think it alone. Apparently something stupid is much easier to pick out by how it sounds then how it seems.

Dammnit it's annoying when you can see the words being typed on the screen after you've stoped typing on the keyboard.

Besides, I am totally aware of the gap between my brian and my mouth. I think really fast. When I was younger, I used to speak really quickly, and no one could tell what the hell I was saying. Then, some how by this point, I've managed to slow down my speaking so I can be heard, but I think at the same speed, so I find myself droping words in order to keep up. It's fun. Everyone once in a while you just gotta look back and wonder, "Wait, what the fuck did I just say?"

Maybe if the prseident only said that once in a while...

Bah. It's summer. I'm going to bed.

F*R*A*G:
1 down, 79 more humorus refrence to the pope to go...

ARTXORED!1!

2006-06-11T17:01:00.000-04:00

Ahh..that's better. Still could use some tweaking, and a nice header pic, but it works for now, and that's amazing on it's own. Now I won't mind being lazy about it.

I'm off to find my copy of FFVII!

F*R*A*G:
"It's the kind of parable Jesus would have been proud to have shared with the hungry masses between bites of magical fishloaf..." -Toastyfrog review of FFVII

ZOMG HAX!1!

2006-06-11T15:01:00.000-04:00

I apologize if you can't see this text. I can't either. This was my attempt to force my old blog layout, which was powered by Greymatter, and the new of course, powered by Blogspot, or more accurately, it was a template created by Dan Cederholm.

More to the point, both of these use CSS (cascading style sheets: basically a more freeform way to make websites look pretty), and I hate CSS. That means what you are looking at now is a bastard child of two CSS templates and my own ramshackle hard coding.

That's not why it's ugly tho.

It's ugly cause I'm only half done. It took me maybe 'round 45 minutes to make all the peices sit correctly. I still have retooled any of the colors to be...readable. And since I have some homework to do and some food to eat, it'll stay this way until...probally late tonight sometime.

I'll get to it, I swear.
F*R*A*G:
Plane? What plane?

Kicked that cricket's ass!

2006-06-11T02:04:00.000-04:00

So quite recetly my definition of "friend" was called into question. Personally, I brought this question up long ago. However, I never shared the answer with anyone, and I suppose that's why people still wonder about that from time to time.

In truth, I never came up with an answer.

::starts playing Dashboard Confesional through a really crappy pair of speakers::

It was just too hard to be honest. Not that doing the impossible has ever stoped me before (I didn't succede, but I didn't not try. And yes, that only makes me stupid.), but it was one of those "it's beyond your power" type of impossible. It's one of those things that have to be defined on an individula basis, considering it's made up of individual experiences and perspectives. One person can see friends as those four guys who I always go drinking with on the weekends, while someone else can consider friends to be everyone who doesn't want to kill me.

So that's what made it kind of hard to define a friend. You have to deine it from scratch basically. But again, hard things don't usually stop me, but illogical things do on occasion, so I had to figure out a way to make defining a friend illogical. So I came at it from the angle that friends are generaly so on a mutual level. But, thinking about it, if each person defines a friend differently, and you can't agree on something as basics as what a friend is, then how can you be friends at all?

After that little bit of thinking, it seemed like the smarter thing to do to just not have friends.

"Give up human contact?!" you ask, "Are you insane?"

I am. But you misunderstand what I'm saying.

It goes back to the whole idea that people are individuals. So Instead of having a single defined group of "friends" that some people are stuffed into, I just started considering each person I know independently. Who I like, who knows what about what, who probally needs to have their eye gouged out with a spork if it wasn't for their usefulness which I won't let them know is the only reason I talk to them for, etc. It seems like a suprisingly cold way to consider "friends", and really it is, but I tell ya it sure does make it more easier to be able to like or hate a certain person and not have it affect your relation to others who, while aquainted with you both, are not directly related to whtever the issue is. I think this ability confuses a lot of people, but it works for me and I'd be happy to try and teach it if they asked me to.

If you thing I'm complely bullshiting this all, try to remember back to this. It's all comming together now, eh? I'm sure my logic is off a bit (a lot. Whatev's) but you sure can't deny that it's damn close enough to truth that you should start listing a bit more closely to me.

Besides, I always hated that show Friends.

But what I hated more was the way that highschool life (and a seemingly lage part of life in general) keeps trying to claim that variables are constants. Like friends. Friends come and go, but that's never really considered. They're just sort of considered to be people who are gonna be there and are gonna be your friends and are gonna follow whatever rules friends follow. Well that sure is blatantly tossed aside, considering how friends can become enemies in a remarkable short period of time. The Social structure in Highschool is remarkable volatile, so it stands out even more. But even then those enemies could become friends again, or even start going out, or any number of things. Besides, Highschool is when people are still finally making final definitions about themselves before heading out into the world to fend for themselves. Things are bound to change.

Then again, I guess it's a good things that people don't really consider that things are bound to change. I mean, times are short as they are, so why ruin good times with this horror that the are not going to last forever? Let people think as they please. I know I myself am a creature of habit who in scared of this idea that things will eventually be complely different. That why I figured I would keep from getting a girlfriend. Two many people had them and then soon had others and it all really just got messy. I thought I'd kill two birds with one stone by waiting so that I would skip all the messy social blunders tha most people have and hopefully be able to make my first my only and not have to deal with breakups and wondering if love can exist after and all those sort of torments.

That plan went out the window. And breaking up with Sheila definately was a kickoff to me "re-evaluating my preconceived decisions". By the way, one of the new decisions says that the breakup itself was probally not the worst thing that will ever happen to me, and was actually probally rather helpful to my ability to adapt to a healthy life.

And while I'm at it, I might as well go ahead and admit that all of the logic I supposedly went thru (mentioned earlier in this article (yes, I'm now going to refer to certain posts as articles.)) was mostly fabricated. I didn't "figure out a way to make defining a friend illogical". That's part of the bullshit. I do, however, consider people each sepreately from each other. That's a god honest truth. It's just something I did unconciously, and once I noticed it, I never really analysed that deeply. Didn't need to. Wasn't broken, so I didn't need to fix it. It's sort of this machecallian method to explaining myself that I have. I know something that's true, and even tho I can't really explain it (without a lot of reasearch and time), I have to come up with something that sounds like truth to make people belive me when I say it's true. And that's about eh definition of bullshit right there, so that partly explains why I've become such a good bullshitter while I've grown up. It's like reading a story, getting the moral, but not being able to rememebr the story itself so I make up a new one to pass on the moral. I'ts just the way my mind works.

By the way, I'm doing it right now. That's okay tho, becuase according to my own argument you can get the importaint part becuse even if the rest is totally wrong it still makes the right point in the end.

Gah. Now I'll try to sleep, and then tomarrow I'll tell of how my sleeping patterns have allready shifted to summer mode.

::Lies back in bed and stares at ceiling, wondering if he should put on Brand New after Dashboard, of if that will be too much for him in his current state::

F*R*A*G:
IT's funny because "services" refers to opening pickle jars, and "goods" refers to breasts.

or

Heaven sent, or just heaven scented?

You're in the military...What do you think of ninjas?

2006-06-01T23:10:00.000-04:00

Okay, I thought I'd pop by tonight just for a quickie (to my brisith readers: No, that's not what I mean.).

I met this guy earlier. He was in the airforce, and he's been in it for about 3 years now, but he had some leave time, and while he was home he came the the WVPCUG. Sadly, he came on one of the MOST BORING NIGHTS EVER. Sucks for him.

But still, he was a cool guy, and we got to talking after the meeting, he told me something which was, by all current accounts, the most awesomest thing ever. We started talking about games and stuff, and I mentioned HL2. He told me that he played through that while he was on duty over in Iraq. And while he was over there, because his job in the air force is being a network administrator (the top computer guy that keeps all the computers running), him and all the other net admins got the biggest rigs, and every Friday was their night to play games over the LAN.

That made my day. I swear.

F*R*A*G:
Me: So wait, the key to becoming one of the great masters of art...is knowing what and how to make things look lifelike, and then blatantly disregarding all of it?
Teacher: ::The evelest glare evar::
Me: ...I broke the code, didn't I?

STFU and think before (I) you hurt (you)rself.

2006-05-22T22:43:00.000-04:00

I'm a twisted bastard, on certain levels, and so I have to laugh at this.

The SCMRPG forums.

Okay, I'll let you know right now: Columbine was some serriously fucked up shit. I don't consider these kids heroes or anything, but I do think that they're people who should definately be looked at. Espically when (I or) even some of the people I know could very well be in their same position (to some extent or another...), and so suddenly it becomes rather importaint to figure out what it is that keeps kids who wear trenchcoats, have access to weapons, know how to create numerous types of explosives, and at some point have been ailenated from society, from becoming the kids who are using all those resources on their classmates. Do you disagree?

I don't see music and/or games being the cause. Music and emotions are undeniably tied together, but I've found that it is generally a person's emotions that dictates what music they listen to. As far as games...I've had DooM on my computer from the point where I figured out "hey, when I push these button things, each one does something specific on the t.v. part!" Desnsitized? Yeah, I won't deny that. But my parents made sure that I knew that it was only a game (along with all the other stuff on the computer), and that in real life things are different. It seems like a duh concept, but because that was set in me so young I have a much firmer concept of that, and honestly, if there's kids out there who play a game and then say "hey, I'm gonna go outside and do all that crazy shit today." then that kid's a lost hope allready, the parent's obviously did some crappy job raising them, and if they do end up getting killed or killing themselves, then that's darwinism, and it's probally a good thing that we're getting these people with blured perceptions out of the gene pool as the world moves ever foreward with the possibilities of the virtural world. And I'll let you know, I'm not desensitized to a rediculous point. The sight of a corpse still makes me queasy and...genearlly makes me shut the fuck up and think about mortality and the beauty of being alive. (side note at this point: Suck it.)

From a gamer perspective, the game isn't bad. But the whole thing is build on the RPG Maker system, and so I went and got that and am gonna be working on my own, so the gaming part I think is sorta void. Premise/story...well, I suppose that's the whole point. That's why I like this Columbin guy who created it. He gets it, and he says so in the forums. The game is not something that idolises these kids, nor is it some sort of instructional program on how to go on a killing spree (belive me, if someone is so inclined, it's the sort of thing they'll be able to figure out on their own). It a memorial. It's esentially the same as a wall on the site of a large battle. Play long enough into the game, and there is a long montage of pictures of people crying, and carnage and havoc and such. I gotta say, I'd be lying if I said I was unmoved. Then, of course, the game follows the boys into hell where they start killing plenty of DooM enemies, and even manage to meet Nitche.

I could go either way at this point...On the one hand, if it ended right after the "aftermath monolouge" it would be much more solemn and probally not have pissed off as many loose-liped critics (optional read as: flaming assholes) as it did, but at the same time, it moves on to prove a point: it is only a game. It has to go back to this origional point of making the difference between real life and games obvious. We do generally have problems when people run around and ruin kids fun because "red rover" isn't sensitive to Indians and fucking dogs. Native Americans. Whatever. You see my point. To have left it solemn would have been nice, but it also would have been a disservice. People need to realize that as soon as anything is taken to serriously, it looses the ability to be taken in a manner that might further mankind. Since I hate people that get on soap boxes saying what mankind needs to do, I'll stop this line now before I become one of them.

There's another good point that's brought up on the forum: Games depicting Vietnam or WWII or what have you are all out in stores, and why should war be treated differntly then this? I don't really think it should. Look at both: Innocents are killed, one way or another, bodies are lying around, there's explosions going off, there's people with weapons, and those same people are quite mentally unstable because of the things they've experienced in life. Now I ask you, which one did I just describe? By the way, Apocalypse Now depicted the horrors of war, and yet people world wide are still fighting and dying. Quite an effect these things seem to have...

To tell you the truth, one thing really freaked me out tho. While you're running around, you're dealing damage in the 60-200 area, and all the people are hitting back with like 3's. Not to mention the seemingly endless supply of weapons at your disposal. Yes, this increases that feeling of senceless massacre, but that's not the part that freaks me out. What gets to me is that back when I played DooM in my early days, I would always play with god mode and infinate weapons turned on. Granted, I did it because otherwise I was such suck back then that I would fall in a hole and die horribly cause I was not 1337majorskillz yet, but damnit if that's not esentailly the same thing.

...

By the way, when I say I have to laugh at it, I'm laughing at the radical flaming that's occuring, and not the senceless death. I'm a bit twised, but I'm not totally cracked you sick freaks.

No more of this tongiht.
F*R*A*G:
I hope this helps to explain that sensation you've been having. In your anus.

The brick holds it up, and the duct tape holds it in.

2006-05-20T22:29:00.000-04:00

[zhwip thok!]

Yeah...I had a kinda interesting day.

[zhwip thok!]

Most people you ask will tell you that that's proablly a lie, but it's true. The reason for both is because I didn't leave the house today. That pissed off the people that wanted me to go out and do stuff.

[zhwip thok!]

My responce was "screw that" and I stayed home.

[zhwip thok!]

Hey, it's not that I'm trying to spite anyone or anything, I just felt like staying home. And I feel it was worth it. Granted, tomarrow I would be up for doing stuff probally, but whatever. Take each day as it comes.

[zhwip thok!]

It sort of ties in with this theory I've had going for a while. You can't expect to be happy with your surroundings if you aren't happy with yourself. Two reasons: Fisrt, you are the the constant for every situation you are in. Friends, places, things...all of those can be different, but you will always be with you. Secondly, not only are you the only one who is sure to stay with you, but you have the greatest ablity to change yourself. It's the same reason. It's hard to change the people and things around you, and even though it can be hard to change yourself too, you're always going to be there to keep at it. Besides, if you can't even do that, then you shouldn't even begin to think of changing anything else.

[zhwip thok!]

But there's a trick to it you see. You breathe in, then put it to your lips, aim, and blow.

[zhwip thok!]

Like I said, I had an interesting day. I learn how to make blowgun darts. It's supprisingly simple. I made 9 in a half hour. And they're good to. I got bored ad shot one straight up, and it stuck in the ceiling. That was awesome. It was even awesome when I shot myself in the foot.

[zhwip thok!]

And as it turns out, I have sensitive feet. Whenever I go out I have shoes on, and if I don't then I pretty much just keep going "ow!ow!ow!oh!ee!ah!shee!etc!" I'm not sure how I ended up that way, but I like my feet. Feet are supposed to be sensitive. There's a lot of nerve endings on your feet to help you figure out the ground and letyou stand really well. Know where else there's a lot of nerve endings? Hands, lips, nipples, and the genital region. Also, suprisingly, on the inside of the knees. Remember that next time you're on a date, fellas. To put it all simply, I can really understand why foot rubs can be so sensual. So next time any of you girls out there wonder if I'm ticklish, try my feet. And if any of you guys are wondering, well, good for you, but I will beat the everliing shit out of you if you try anything.

[zhwip thok!]

Damn. Now there's a dart stuck in my ceiling.

F*R*A*G:
It's like a choose your own adventure story, except I'm not giving you a choice.

Andy Milionokis needs to be smacked.

2006-05-16T14:53:00.000-04:00

F*R*A*G:
Triskut wrote:
"Lolz! U can play the old ts just d-load it rename ur ts2.1 folder to like poop or whatever and name the other one TS and then TS_lv and there u go u can play the old ts no 1s prolly on but hey u still can Wink"

Schmung wrote:
Im going to ban you if I ever, ever see a post like that again from you.
Sentences motherfucker, do you use them?
Same applies for basic spelling, grammar and coherency.

Bacon

2006-05-16T06:12:00.000-04:00

My brain meats hurt. I'll get back later.

F*R*A*G:
Well, I'd tell ya, but truth is I don't give enough of a damn to know.

Sav3 teh interwebs!!!11

2006-05-14T12:07:00.000-04:00

Please act immediately to save the Internet. The internet, as it has been created since it's development, has become a place which goes beyond the borders of any one person, state, or country. It is essence a whole new world, one which is free of constraints and limited only by imagination. In that lies the beauty of the internet. The freedom is promises people. To filter and control the content of the internet would put this country in a very similar position as to that of China. However, American would not simply stand by as it happened. The most likely outcome of the would affair would be the abandonment of the internet, destroying it, along with the origional beauty it promised.

More that that, the internet was created as a means to gather and complie information, and to this point in time has fuffiled, and even gone beyond, that ideal. Granted, there are numerous sites dedicated to pornography and racial hate groups and even promoters of illegal acts. But, the law breakers are arrested for their doings in the real world, hate groups are attacked by the will of the majority of the people, and considering the amount of content on the internet, viewing pornography is done by choice, and the repurcussions of that are limited to the viwer themselves, leaving others to thier own doings.
Further on the content available to the well intented patrons of the internet, the possibilities are virtually infinate. The comming together of people from a worldwide scene has led to a realization of infinate inteligence. The only way to not find something on the internet is to purposely look for something which you know does not exist. Even at that, however, you will still be supprised by how many of those queries will still return content. And in the event that it doesn't, as a person with a computer, it is possible to put content out there yourself, thus further elminating the holes in the internet, and bringing it ever closer to being a complete compendium of all known human knowledge.

Also, the internet is becoming a new way for a person to support themselves. While certain sites like Amazon and E-bay are held as top purchasing sites on the internet, that is not limiting others, such as my own family and neighbors, from setting up their own shops and promoting their businesses.

Much on the same vein, the internet allows for everyone to have a place for self expression. As an artist , this is a very importaint issue to me, as I rely on the internet to serve as a gallery so others can view my work. This same feeling also to applies to writers and musicians and people who are experimenting with the new possibilities found in digital medias. Simply put, I do not want to be deemed "unsuitable" or "unessissairy" and replaced by something else which is, simply, not me.

So I ask you to vote for enforceable network neutrality, not simply because I don't want to be filtered, because it would destroy the foundation of the internet as a free space where all are equal and the will of the people truly does rule, or even because it could ruin capitalistic ventures and there by people who can not find work elsewhere, but also because I belive that control of the internet would not work. The thechnologicaly elightened among us would simply do what they always have done, and invent new ways of getting this done, even if it involved returning to a older form of the internet where private networks connected directly to each other, where the controling companies could not touch them. This is a truth in the nature of the "techies" who invented the internet and keep it running strong.

The internet does not belong to companies, it belongs to the people, and everyone who continues to create it and expand it. Please express these feelings to the rest of the nation.

(This is the only time I'm going to mention this. I feel strongly about it, but I'm lazy and personally hate a lot of the people who are whiny liberal bastards who are always talking about taking action, even if they do take action. Good for them, they should keep at it, just as long as they know that if they don't get off my lawn I'm going to break their kneecaps with my crowbar. I have other things to deal with, and I'm looking out for numero uno.)

F*R*A*G:
Give the drummer some! Cauz dadrummaainhadnuninawahhhhh...

Please place all metalic, explosive, or magical items in the tray.

2006-05-07T22:03:00.000-04:00

So, I think I learned something. I think. Or I knew it allready but just never knew it. It's something cool to realize. The world is like a giant sand box. I always had this weird sort of preconception that things are differnet in differnet situations. Best example I can give is like a teacher is a teacher, but if you see one anywhere else, it can be rather surreal. Or like a buttler, or someone who wroks at a store, or anything like that. It wasn't until I wasa in a position like that that I finally learned that people are people, and wether or not they're working or in curch or whatever, they're still people.

So, that clearing up some really messed thinking proccesses, it opened the door for some other similarly liberating thought. Like...Cars don't need to follow the roads! The idea is that basically you can do whatever you want. Rules can only limit you if you choose to follow them. In the end, you are the only one to limit yourself. This is cool cause this means y'all can't stop me.

The only reason I mention this is because now that I'm the driver, a certain time honored tradition in my family has been taken for a new spin, and requires that I take some questionably legal turns around the town of Warwick. Also, it's given me more new insights to the origin of my ninja-ness.

Yes, now I'm the one who drives the car on dumpster diving/garbage pickin' night while my dad hangs out the door and nabs the cool shit.

Say what you will, but we got some awesome shit that way. Why, in the past week alone we picked up a light bar like they got on cop cars, 3 vacuum cleaners, a power washer, a stereo, a gituar amp, a couple of window fans, and almost a wheelchair...if we had had enough room for it.

Point is... the trick to being good at this is you need to be able to work under the cover of darkness, and you need to be quick you can nab the stuff and get away before the police/owner of the house arrive (even tho odds are they won't). Also, you gotta have a good eye to spot the good stuff in the first place. There is a good load of actual garbage out there...so you need to be able to pick out the good things. Then, of course, the biggest test of ninja is being able to make it home without waking mom who'll so totally beat the crap out of me and dad with a rolling pin because this'll make the 23rd thing we've brought home this week.

Now, while my dad does this because he has the amazing ability to fix crap which people throw out (helpful hint: the richer the people, the easier the fix/the cooler the stuff!), I have to put it to some other use.

I call it the pile of crap theory. It's based on certain principles. It's like this: I put as much crap in my room as possible. As I put more and more stuff in my room, the probably of being able to find things in my room goes up. Theorethically, if I get enough crap in my room, then I may be able to drive probability up high enough that I can begin to find things in my room because of probability alone, independent of wether or not it was ever put in my room to begin with.

Man, I love messing around with quantim mechanics. And I still belive that Thermodynamics has A LOT to do with lighting things on fire and then throwing them.

F*R*A*G:
Look'it that, Flip. You did something!

Radar Earring

2006-04-29T22:34:00.000-04:00

Honestly now, people suck at map. I was told 4 or 5 different ways to get to Tim's House, and 2 were rediculously out of the way and one was just plain old wrong.

This is the cloest way.

Well, actually, I might go up upper wisner instead of sticking on lower wisner, but that might just be me. I like being given a start and end point and having to figure ways through. That's one of the reasons I've always liked Rally races. Of course, with those there's one guy driving and the passenger is giving driving directions. I couldn't do that part. By this point, I've more than learned that I should not listen to people. They're bad for me.

And, while I'm on the topic of how to get to Tim's house, I might as well go in to why it's so imparitive why I know how to get there. I like Tim. Tim is like...I dunno. I guess that like if Ryan is my tatical/asskicking partner for games/construction/general nerding, then Tim is my art/crazyness/idea making. We're in synch, ya' know? Just...lazy, so nothing really gets done between us. But we still have fun.

It's even more importaint that I learn things about my friends, considering that we'll be off to college all to soon...

Nyo?

F*R*A*G:
Beefy Parakeet is Dave Letterman's favorite Campbells Soup variety.

This messiah thing is just a side gig. I have a real job asshole!

2006-04-20T23:05:00.000-04:00

So, have I ever told you that I'm probally gonna get a job as a janitor? It's not that I want to be one, or that I really have any interest at all in the janitorial industry...but it just seems like destiny. Whenever I end up voluntiering (read: find out that I've been voluntiered / am told) to do some work with the KoC or any people who need work, I always end up putting tables away and/or mopping floors and/or moving heavy shit from one place to another and/or throwing shit out and/or any number of other things that have to do with manual labor and/or construction/destruction. Always.

Not that I really have a problem with that. Manual labor is just like...something I do. Intelligence be damned. Sometimes I just get tired of thinking. At least, thinking on purpose. I find any sort of cleansing to be a very spritual thing. This goes for any kind of cleaning...even...washing old filing cabinets. It must have something to do with the symbolism of cleansing...new beginings...rebirth...removing of defects and ill marks...some crap like that. Crap or not, it's suprisingly true. As you cleanse, you also cleanse the mind. I don't mind moving shit around and washing shit because it gives me a lot of time to think.

But if not a janitor, I should probally be a bartender. My mom told me that. Something about...people tend to open up to me, I'm polite enough to keep people coming back, but still have enough badass to be able to throw trouble makers out on their asses. And apparently bartenders can make big bucks. Looks like I know what I might be doin in college...

Can anyone teach me how to mix drinks? I don't think soy sauce in kool-aid counts.

F*R*A*G:
"Yes, I did say robot." --Ralph Nader.

Lessons.

2006-04-17T00:58:00.000-04:00

Okay, so over the past week or so I've learned a few things. Some are more importaint than others, but anything learned is just another step towards condensing the universe into a single thought and memorizing it. The majority of these things follow.

Somewhere, I learned the core combat tatic of "Let your enemies know where you are, and then don't be there." I've always found this to be a sturdy saying that has proven itself on numerous occasions. However, I've found that it really should only be used as a backup to the first tatic of "Don't let your enemies know where you are." Stealth is a very esential key, but once you blow that you need deception. Or everyone could go for about two days of solid killing action and then get caught up in real life again and forget about battle until the last two days of break.

Next is a lesson in Mercedes-Benz engineering: A Mercedes-Benz drives with the consistency of pudding. Fast pudding, but pudding none the less. I was in the city for Thrusday so that me and my father could pick up our new automotice aquisition. We then had to drive it back home. It's kinda a crazy car...automatic/electronic everything, buttons and knobs out the wazoo, and a moonroof. But the way I mean it's pudding is that left-to-right wise, it steers somewhat like a boat (it'll only tilt if you don't turn the wheel enough, but once it does turn it's suprisingly sensitive), and yet it has quite a bit of pickup (Dad: "Wow! We're allready doing 90!" Me: "The speed limit's only 60" Dad: "85, 80, 70...")

Building a computer is easy. All you need is a case with motherboard and powersupply, then stick in a video card, sound card, and network card/modem. Then plug in the shit and you're ready to go. The tricky part to all this is if you need to...say...canabalize the three games computers in your basement because an unnamed friend managed to fry one of them so you switch parts around and find other parts around the basement to fix it, and you learn the wonders of parts, drives, power cables, video drivers, switching fans out of powersupplies so they stop smelling like burnt, putting the right ram chips in in the right order, switching cases when you realize everything you need is not going to fit, and then learning the really importaint part is to keep a window open and fan blowing because otherwise you will literally choke to death on the amount of dust that can build up inside a computer.

I now know I can cook some damn good pork chops.

If you are someone who plays RPG games, then there is an extremely high possibility that you have no life. It just seems this way to me, but this may only seem more apparent with RPG games because they can be very addicting. I know I must have put over 60 hours into playing the specialists in the entire time that I've had it, but I don't know for sure. I do know that in teh last 4 days-ish I've put 15+ hours into Samuari Legend Musashi. It's a very good game tho. I should be done with it very soon.

The mall can be a cool place. Just the other day Tim and I went to the Galleria to see Scary Movie 4 (TY4Smoking is playing there now!), and after the movie were we looking at the bunnies, then went to buy jawbreakers, then on the way back saw a whole buncha security guards surrounding an empty store front that apparently moments before had shattered somehow. (I snagged a glass shard. A token.) Then , as we began to wonder what to do next, the fire alarm in the mall went of. At least, we assumed it was. It sounded annoying and there were flashing lights, so we left. That's more cool that's come out of one trip to the mall then at least the last 5 trips.

I do look much better clean shaven.

Just think what you could learn tomarrow.

F*R*A*G:
Ah, Musashi!

Clasification

2006-04-08T22:14:00.000-04:00

I have come to a conclusion. There is no valid reason to watch Neon Genesis Evangelion. It will be labeled masochistic, and then anyone who wishes to view it will do so at their own discression and risk.

It's bad enough that every episode you watch is more and more fucked up, but then by the end when all sorts of shit that can't (and with any regard to human sanity, SHOULDN'T) happen begins to start happening all at once, it's just a liiiitle bit to much.

As for me, I was lucky. Two days ago I had a paper to write. I was up until 1:30 in the morning on that night trying to get it done, and so I Was to tired to watch it before going to sleep. The nights before I was also tired, so I was really getting to a breaking point. My plan was to watch them (note: them being the final 2 Eva movies (talk to Anders about that, but again, only at your own risk)) after I woke up on friday, but from 3:00 shen I got home, I slept until 8:30 the next morning. Quick math: that was about 16 hours, give or take, and this was a good thing. Not only was I finally actually rested (moreso then I have been in quite a while), but I was in a condition to watch these movies and survive. If I had watched them while still tired, I most likely would have been silent for about 42 minutes, and then after that have just started laughing histerically, and then actually managed to laugh myself to death. Also, I would have left a note that would have caused the first few readers to kill themselves. That's the effect that movie would'a had on me, because that's just the kinda guy I am.

But I must say, the movie end was much better then the series end. It actually managed to sum things up and then end them while not actually forgetting that there was a storyline beforehand. It was severily fucked up, but it was still better. Note that I never said it made sence.

For some reason, since I made to it really near then end of the series until now, I've been thinking back to this one episode of the Upright Citizens Brigade that I saw once. It was the one with the Bucket of Truth. It was a bucket of pure unadulterated truth. Anyone who looked into it was driven mad because they now knew the truth about the soul of man. Then there was the renegade cop who had nothing to live for anymore. You know the kind. Drives fast. Drinks a lot. Lost his wife. Goes to bed crying everynight with his gun in his mouth. That sorta guy. Last few seconds of the episode, he finally says "I can't take it anymore. GOD! I'M GOING TO SEE THE TRUTH YOU BASTARD!!!!" And sticks his head in the Bucket of Truth. He pulls his head out, but instead of running off into oblivion like everyone else who has looked into it does, he just turns up to heaven and screams at God, "DON'T YOU THINK I KNOW THAT ALLREADY?"

(Full summation can be found here.)

I think there was a good chance that there was a copy of Eva in the bucket. Maybe two. Two copies and half an apple pie with a scoop or two of strawberry ice cream.

F*R*A*G:
::Grabs violently by the shoulders and looks straight in the eyes:: THEY ALL BECAME ONE. THAT IS NOT RIGHT.

Preperations A through G

2006-04-05T23:00:00.000-04:00

There's a reason I don't correct all my clocks for DST is 3 fold:

1) DST is gay. Fucking farmer's math.

2) It's a secret plan. By having some clocks ahead by an hour for half the year, it forces me to self-adjust to the belief that it's later then I thought, and then for the other half of the year I will think I have more time which will be a bit of stress release, and then all the while I will have an acurate grasp of time as well.

3) Number 2 is total bullcrap. I'm lazy, and only doing a couple means that I've done half the work, for two halves of the year. That's a total work, so it balances out.

I just thought I'd share that with you all.

Oh yeah, and don't get me wrong, I'm not using gay as a degratory term there. Just to say something's ass backwards, and doesn't make much sense. Humans are split into two sexes so that they can come together to create new life. I got no problem with gay. In fact, I'm probally around 32% gay. At least. And probally about...44% Taco. That's something different tho...

SO yeah, I got a buncha theories I've been toying around with on comercialism, atraction, souls, art, religion, and just a lot of stuff. No reason in particular really...just had a big workload lately, and my brain is despreately trying to escape. I don't blame it. I am very tired. As soon as Friday comes I'm going to hit a wall and sleep for the entire weekend. Then do some of my own work. Spring break is gonna be sweet, cause I'm gonna play Samuari Legend Musashi. Plus this own work of my own is gonna be like the Information Prougecast and other fine Public Broadcasting, my comic (Which I am in the middle of inking...but more on that later), stories to write, quotes to coagulate, some video projects I wanna try, and just a bunch more games I wanna get back into playing. Then of course, there's some other "Quote, unquote" stuff that I wanna get into. Not get into isn't in quotes, because it's not innuendo. Nessissairly.

Oh well, back to the lava mines.

F*R*A*G:
Oh my god...it's their ultimate weapon...THE BATSHIT BEAM. IT MAKES PEOPLE GO BATSHIT.

Color pallete

2006-03-30T22:05:00.000-05:00

The wooly mamoth is an ancestor of the modern elephant that lived during the ice age. Name one possible reason for why the species died out.

Because it got too hot.

...

Okay, that sucked. I had the idea for that to be this big dramatic thing, but it didn't work. I just watched The Weather Man, and lemmie tell ya, it's nothing like Anchorman.

The Bow is a fucking symbol.

If I've learned one thing from movies and sessions screaming at the moon and English class, it is that everything is a symbol. A pair of sunglases. An empty feild. A christmas decoration that has been hanging outside of a house for god knows how many years. A panda. Everything at least has the potential to be a symbol. For an epoch of time, a confined perception of reality, an event that repeats itself in your mind over and over again, a person...

I hate symbolism. I love it and I hate it. It must be a curse that comes with being in tune with all things dramatic - Being able to turn anything (and most often everything, wether with will or against it)into a symbol for something else. Makes life seem too much like a movie. Life isn't a movie though. All it really does is take you away from the reality of all things and makes real life all the harder to live in.

Oh well. I might be able to get a damn good job as a director at this rate.

Point is... I seem to have a really good knack for picking out some fucked up movies. The Weather Man is only the latest one. Fight Club, Adaptation, Weekend, Garden State, Falling Down. Any of those movies that have a soundtrack made by hippies who used to live in a ghetto, and generally has the main character living on the edge of stability, fucked up life of the past on one side, brand new life of promise and joy on the other, even though they can't seem to figure out the life changing fact that's oh so obvious to most observers.

In the good ones, that character goes totally apeshit and either shoots themselves, or tricks someone else into shooting them. Those are the ones that I like most I think.

Anyway, life moves on...

...

fucking bathtub-symbol.

F*R*A*G:
Hot damn, you're right! It does look just like a brain down there!

I am not very happy with the torpedos.

2006-03-29T23:01:00.000-05:00

I would like to begin by letting you know that there is a head on my floor.

This is much like there being a bird in my wall, but different.

Even tho the head I'm talking about is actually the only bit of the Zaku II that I've built so far, the way I tied that in right there (You like the way I did that? Eh? Eehhh?) leaves me with a nice setup to go into what I like about the inset of spring/summertime.

Really, each season is in my mind with a certain memory tied to it. Winter has that one night where I walked out into my backyard, and the snow was unadulterated and the moon was bright, casting cool shadows all over. Spring is when I was trying to take a nap in my room while listening to LP's Reanimation album next to an open window whick showed not only a nice orange sky, but also let the smell of a not-so-far off barbeque (yet another reason why that album holds a special place to me). Summer has the night that me and...I think it was Rachel and Lauren...and we were catching fire flies in the front yard. Fall...The last time I had a good time in fall was I think...Err...no, fall sucks. There was a trip to...some...place...but that was just because the falling leaves were dramatic. Otherwise fall always seems to suck. At least ever since I started school. When you have to have your pet kitty put to sleep the day before your first day of school in a brand new house, it generally stands as a bad omen.

But mind you, These are just some of the memories drawn to mind. I have a lot more, and many of them have to do with playing Time Crisis. Or watching Gundam Wing. Or Space Ghost or Cartoon Cartoon Fridays or any number of nerdy things. Or emo things. I've spent many dusks/twilights/nights being depresed or sad or confused or talking to people who share those sentiments or writing poetry or whatever. I still consider some of those good memories. Gave me some good ideas if nothing else.

Man, I just noticed how used to a computer keyboard I am. I can't even see the keys but I just know where they are with my fingers. It wasn't to long ago that I never considered that a posability. Also, I can't wait until John Basedow dies in some sort of horrible excersice related acident. Not because I wish him any harm, but I think it's time for Fitness Made Simple to open up for a new spokesperson. You know, maybe one known for something other then being the Fitness Made Simple spokesperson.

But the biggest thing that brings all this up is staying up late watching TV. That's whar I know best through all my life. And after being sick this morning and then sleeping till 11, I'm sort of being forced to be awake right now. I'd like to sleep, and my eyes hurt, but at the same time I find I can't get comfortable and I have this odd craving to go into Chester for...the hell of it? Wendy's? A donut? Hell, I dunno. I'm too tired to know. And I would sleep so that then I would know, but then again that sorta ruins the whole point of things...

Ugh. I don't want to think of the future. It seems like it's going to be soooo much work. I'd rather go back to the past. Well, can't do that. Just can't.

I always blog when I can't sleep. I belive that explains freshman year fairly well.

F*R*A*G:
A pair of huge doors open, and into the arena stride two 10 story machines of destruction. The crowd goes fucking wild.

or

"Ray Romano is a horny mammoth." -- Jon Stewart

Hunter's point...I like how it gives new meanings...

2006-03-27T19:24:00.000-05:00

So Sage says that I'm a nice guy. I'm inclined to belive her because it's a nice thing to be told. It's also nice to be assured that you're not a bastard for...certain other acts you commit.

Oh yeah, and I like King's Estates a lot. As it turns out, it's what I've been missing up here. Specifically, it's got a nice view where as dusk/twilight sets in you can see a darkening road which crests a hill and then it's just empty sky behind it. That's a sight to behold.

I miss that. I used to be able to get that same view in the old days back in the city. As I looked down the block I lived on, it was at an angle with the empty old rail yard with the river behind it, so very much the same effect: A bit of road with shitload of sky behind it.

And the really cool part is that taking the shortcut (which I am now familar with...might be taking it more often (if I ever leave the house...)) it such a sudden switch. Like diving from an open road/sky down into a dungen with tree walls and ceilings. That's really cool. Still, the lower level (As I will call Whicam in comparision to KE from now on) has cool sections where the tress just open, and you see a dome of sky overhead, totally enveloping you. This is still a really cool experience, when compared to that open sky/hill/road thing in KE, which while nice and nostalgic, is still confined to a suprisingly narrow road.

Still, I'm gonna write some movie things specifically to film on that stretch of road. It's too good to pass up on.

F*R*A*G:
Allow me to elaborate on how we must colaborate:
My fist in your face is its destined place.

Or

"I've finally decided. When I go to college, I'm going to major in NINJA."

Theories

2006-03-23T21:55:00.000-05:00

See, this is the latest that I've figured out, and as far I know it's a good one.

When a woman asks you a question, it is never yes or no. Sometimes it may seem that way, but it's really not. The reason for this is they they do not ask the whole question. In order to get the right answer, you must first finish the question, and then answer that entire question. Yes, you do have to be a kind of mind reader.

Tell me if you can get this to work too.

F*R*A*G:
When they come to kill me I'll be sitting at a desk with a bulletproof gun and a hand in my vest.

Summation

2006-03-20T15:42:00.000-05:00

(Read the full article at this website. This is just a part that I liked!)

Opponents might try to jump at him, only to get hit by the fierce. They might try to throw a fireball, only to be hit out it by the fierce. They might try to walk up and dragon punch the fierce, only have me not do a fierce punch that time. I waited for them to miss their dragon punch, then fierced them back. Actually, retaliating with a fierce isn’t even necessarily the best move in that situation, but it’s sure the most annoying.

F*R*A*G:
When I play with myself, I can get like 40 straight repititions. ::gets stared at:: What? I'm just that good at haki sack!

Big 3 and the 14 Yakuza

2006-03-14T14:52:00.000-05:00

Okay, I have a plan. It's not much of one, but it is one nonetheless.

Last time there were parent teacher confrences, I went and I was a helper for Mr. Sorensen. I did it just for the hell of it, and since I did with Jon C-R I knew it couldn't be that bad. In honesty, it actually kinda rocked. After hours the school seems so much more open and free...Nothing like durring the regular day. Still doesn't really have any good climbing spots tho. Anywho...I volunteered to do it again. Not for Sorensen, but for Woodring this time. I don't know if it'll still be cool, but hell, can't be all that bad.

Now, the only problem with all this is that tomarow I also have drivers ed at 4:30, and I need to be at Woodring's by 7. Basically I'm gonna get to come home for an hour and a half after school, then I'll be back there until aroun 9-ish, at least. Hey, at least it's just a few long things rather then a bunch of short things. The only part that's really dick about all this is that it's my birthday. Well, to ballance that out my mom let me compromise and take Thrusday off, so it'll all clear up nicely. Maybe my present will show up that day and I can spend it BUILDING GIANT ROBOT!

*Cough*

Now, as for that plan I was first talking about... first, do the little bit of homework I have. Then help my mom try to fix the tire on the car. Following that, take a shower (I admit, after gym today I feel excedingly rank) Once Freshened, dance around to my whim by playing UT 2004, Soul Calibur 3, Rachet and Clank, or Wild Arms 3, or even Photoshopping some pictures or writing in that story I started oh so long ago. Wherever I may end up, I am going to make sure I play some SC3 by the end of the day. Then, much sleep will follow.

Oh, and btw Ry, I have your book. You'll get it back tomarrow.

F*R*A*G:
If it was just Robots, then I would still probally be interested. Just Empire, and ehh...could go either way. But, Robots AND Empire! Now we're ready to fucking rock!

inapropreate comment that no one understands so it's allright!

2006-03-12T23:41:00.000-05:00

So I was thinking today, and half in making fun of emo, half in being emo myself, I came up with this:

Some people sometimes have trouble telling if they're alive, I have troubles sometimes telling if anyone else is alive.

This sounds like a really bad statment, but I don't think it really is.Maybe it is. Ignore that for now.

Now, in order to asure you of my actual punk status, I'll have you know I was part of a group of hoodlems who were chased out of Stanley Deming park by three cop cars. Better then that, it was the second time I've gotten chased out for playing too late.

First time was cause me and the TA at NYSSSA were playing hakisack at like 3
AM, and then the cops rolled right up on the sidewalk where we were. Well...had been. We saw cops and ran. Next thing you know everyone is being told by the cops to vacate the building.

This time it was capture the flag. I'm a lot better at it then I thought, actually. Never actually played it before. When I was a little chillun', I didn't play games with the other chillun'. I tried, but I sucked. I actually met more people while sitting on the side being all bad at playig then I did on the rare occasion I did get in some game. Actually, where I excelled was in hanging upside down by me knees on the jungle gym. Didn't fall much, and when I did, I always remembered to put out my arms so I didn't land on my head. I even took an actual gymnastics class once. Didn't last to long. But that's where Nicky got his start at being a ninja. Hiding in the jungle gym while hanging upside down.

One last note: I've been told a few times now that I'm going to hell. I've also been told that I'm definately not going to hell, implying that heaven is a very probable outcome. I don't think I'll end up in either place tho. My after life is going to consist of a like 200X200 square of land floating over an eternal black void, with a mailbox and a small white house with a couch and nice TV/stereo system. For all eternity. Just like in the hidden egg in ahl_nocredit.bsp.

meh. At the moment, I'm not going anywhere.

F*R*A*G: Okay, this one time Randy Beaman was at his cousin's house and he put a cheese sandwich on the table and then he turned around and his cousin played the most mind blowing drum solo anyone has ever heard ever and then when Randy Beaman turned back around, there was a grilled cheese sandwich on the table. Kay, bye.

EMINENT!!!!

2006-03-08T06:08:00.000-05:00

Okay, here's somehting so horrible that I Couldn't pass up making a quick note of it.

I was doing my thing as I usually do, downloading a new HL mod, when I saw an advertisment in the corrner of the DL window. It shocked me.

SHOP 'TILL YOU DROP!

It's a game, for a cell phone, about shopping, which is based on an old T.V. show. Now there's a sgin of the times in America. What's worse is that from the screen shots, it looks like a good amout of work went into this game. Not supprising, really. I just hope that for all that is good and moral and crap, that nobody plays this game.

...Although, it would be neat if you could play for real prizes while waiting in line in an actual store. Then when you got to the head of the line you just show the clerk your high score and walk out with your new blender. That might be modernism.

F*R*A*G: I have a good mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.

...Decends from the heavens, glowing and godlike.

2006-03-05T09:33:00.000-05:00

So I suppose this is like my wonderous return to blogging. It had just been way too long. Videos are nice and all, and I definately want to keep at them (Anders keeps having ideas, and many of them are not repulsive!) but the classic "write a whole lotta shit randomly and then people can read or not" format still calls to me.

Besides, when I write the scripts for the movie ones, I start by just doing it old school random writie style to get a script to follow. By that logic, if I wanted to I could go back and make any post into movie form. It's just a slightly different way of thinking of set up, cause with movie you need to know where you're gonna film for each section. For reading, the scene is always just {in front of a whole lot of words}.

I'm back!

F*R*A*G: I almost used "kill" as the solution to a problem in my kitchen. I've either played too much Tenchu, or not enough Tenchu.